Category: My weird, wonderful, insane, ranting, raving, articulating claptrap

So this last week I’ve done so much it’s unbelievable.

The cardigan is still a work in progress. This last week I think I’ve done about 6 rows.

So been really busy with knitting this week as you can tell from the great humongous number of rows I’ve done. So yeah really really really busy with knitting. And that massive numbers of rows have been done today.

I think the only thing I’ve managed to complete this week is a little purple doll to go with the big one I made last week.

So yeah that’s about it. The only other thing I’ve done is tweak a lip balm recipe. I’d used a bit of it already and I realised it seemed to work just as well on my hands as it did on my lips.

I melted it down again and added some rose hip oil, some evening primrose oil and some vitamin e oil. Put it back in the pot and I’ve now been using it for a bit of everything. It’s gone on my hands, my lips, my feet and anywhere else I’ve needed to use it. It’s been working really well.

I’ve been feeling crap today. My MS has been playing up. The dizziness has been crap for a while. Stupidly worse than it’s been for some time. I’ve been feeling sick and just generally meh. The anxiety has been playing up. The only way I can describe the way I’m feeling is that something isn’t right.

With what’s going on in the world at the moment the stuff I’m going through pales in comparison so it doesn’t feel right talking or moaning about it. But this is my space, I made it and I can talk about what I want in it. If I feel like moaning and griping here I can and I will. I don’t want to dwell on the doom and gloom though. It doesn’t help and just brings me down. And that shouldn’t really be possible with all the drugs I’m on.

I did get a bit scared the other day when out of the blue I got a phone call from someone asking different questions like address and date of birth and if there was someone here who can do all the other bits that need doing like go shopping and get prescriptions and stuff. After the call I was worried that someone was trying to steal my identity or something. That’s because something didn’t feel right on the call and straight after I googled to try and find out if this was something the government were doing for the people in super duper mega lockdown. The first thing that came up was something about scams and people being ripped off. Something like that doesn’t help much when the anxiety is already playing up. So more worry set in. Mum realised something wasn’t right with me and then talked me down and explained it. She works wonders that woman. I know I couldn’t deal with someone like me so she deserves a medal.

I have no idea why but I’m finding the create and craft channel on sky strangely addictive. I haven’t bought anything and I don’t think I would. I’m going to sound really old now but it’s ok to have on as a bit of company. Something in the background that you don’t have to pay any attention to while you’re doing something else. It’s sky channel 683 if you’re interested. (Not that you are)

So, I’ve said it before but it’s worth saying again stay safe, stay well and Love and light.

So it’s been a few more weeks in lockdown. There isn’t really much else to say about that. I can’t remember if I said in my last post that I got told I was in the extremely vulnerable group, the 12 week group.

I got told in a letter from the GP and I’ve even been spammed by text messages from the government. So I haven’t been anywhere to tell you about. I’ve just been doing crafts. So still plodding along with my cardigan. Only have the two front borders to do. I was well into and nearly finished with the first border but I became concerned with the amount of wool I had left.

At some point I made a mistake when I was buying the wool and got a ball that must have been from a different dye lot or something and it’s a little bit darker than the rest so it doesn’t match. So from the rest of the wool that’s the same as everything else I wasn’t sure if I had enough to do both borders. So rather than having two different shade borders I pulled back the one I’d done and I’m going to do both in the same wool that’s just a bit darker. I thought that would be better than having a slight colour change halfway through one of the borders. So now they should match up even if they aren’t quite the same colour and the rest of the cardigan. I know I’ve said it already but I promise that when it’s all finished I’ll put up some pictures.

So what else have I been up to? Well I haven’t done any crochet recently, been focused on knitting the cardigan. But over the last week I’ve been doing something new. I’ve been doll making. A couple of weeks ago I won a book called Making Soft Dolls while watching a live stream on YouTube. I found out about it when I was flicking through some emails and came across one from The Makerss that talked about the launch of their new book. I watched the stream and found it interesting and the fact I won something from the experience was even better. I was the first one to comment with the answer to the question Steffi asked. “What was the name of her first doll”? The answer was Peter and his second name I have no idea how to spell so I’m not going to try. Steffi is from Germany and the doll was handed down through the family and had been well loved. Peters last name is something to do with the fact it’s a doll or something. The book is called Making Soft Dolls by Steffi Stern and if you’re interested you can get a signed copy of the book here:

https://www.themakerss.co.uk/collections/doll-making/products/making-soft-dolls-book-by-steffi-stern

I found out about The Makerss last year at a craft show I went to with mum. She suggested getting into needle felting as the kits and things they had on their stall looked really good. so that where my journey with the Makerss started. They sell everything you need to do needle felting from kits to just the wool and the needles. Go have a look:

https://www.themakerss.co.uk

Just warning though, it is quite addictive and if you stab yourself with a needle it really really hurts. But now moving on from needle felting they sell everything that you’d need if you wanted to make dolls.

So with the doll making. Over the last week Steffi has been running a sew along live stream on YouTube. I got the pack when I won the book and was determined to follow along. The videos are still on YouTube if you want to take a look so you can follow along if you decide to make a doll. I found the videos/streams really good, you could see what you were supposed to be doing and chat with Steffi and everyone else that was watching along. So now the time has come for me to show you the fruits of my labour:

To say I was chuffed when I’d finished him was an understatement. I was practically buzzing. I was so happy with myself that I had made and sew something so good. Normally my sewing is pretty rubbish. I could just about do a passable job sewing together the crocheted and knitted toys so this, I feel, has taken things to the next level. I’m happy and think it looks really good.

So that’s about it craft wise but I’ve been doing some work again on lotions and potions. I made some hand cream and some lip balm. I think I put the recipes I used for the hand cream in my last post, but here are the ingredients for the lip balm:

• 2 tbs Beeswax
• 1 tbs Shea Butter
• 1 tbs sweet almond oil
• 1 tbs jojoba oil
• 1 tbs avocado oil
• 1 tbs vegetable glycerin

All you have to do is melt everything together and put it in pots. One in pots I added some essential oils and mixed them before they set. I used

• Lemon and lime
• Peppermint
• Spearmint
• Orange

They didn’t do much for the taste but it made them smell really nice. So a bit of aromatherapy and some good moisturisation for the lips. I have some new ingredients to play with now so new concoctions will be on their way. I now have coconut oil (had that before but have more now), cocoa butter, macadamia nut oil, evening primrose oil, rose hip oil and some vitamin e oil. So let’s see where all these things take us.

I’m now trying to decide if I want to buy any more ingredients for other bits but that’s a decision for down the line.

Right time to get back to my knitting, doll making or cosmetics or something completely different. As the song goes “who knows what tomorrow brings“? Only way to find that out is by going to sleep. Let’s just hope that’s a lot earlier than it has been for the last couple of nights. I’ve seen 5am from the wrong side it’s not fun being awake for most of the night and then feeling shitty and tired all day. But sod that.

So stay safe everyone, love and light.

Sorry for not posting anything recently. Being stuck in doesn’t really give you much to talk/write about.

So what feels like 6 months ago not much has changed. I’m a bit further along with my cardigan. All I have to do with it now is do some borders and sew it all up.

I’ve finally finished the sleeves. They felt like they took forever. The rest seemed to be done quite quickly but the sleeves were something else. But they’re done now and It’s time for the next bit of the pattern. At the moment it’s all being held together with fold back clips. That’s just so I could line it up and figure out what goes where. When it’s finished I’ll put up some pictures.

What else have I been doing?

Well I’ve had a go at making hand cream. I found some recipes online and got the bits. So mixture of different oils like avocado, jojoba and sweet almond. Bit of bees wax, some Shea butter and some glycerin. All made in different combinations and with different things done to them. It’s actually a lot easier that you’d think. There have been a mix of different essential oils added to them aswell. This time I’ve gone for ones to help heal skin and moisturise it.

Not that you’re bothered but here is a recipe for one of the hand creams I’ve done:

20grams Shea butter

10grams jojoba oil

10 grams avacado oil

5 grams bees wax

5 grams vegetable glycerin

5 drops sandal wood oil

3 drops myrrh essential oil

3 drops Frankincense essential oil

3 drops ceaderwood atlas essential oil

And for the other one I’ve done:

40 grams Shea Butter

20ml avocado oil

20ml jojoba oil

2 drops each of, myrrh, frankincense, benzoin, cedar wood atlas, hyssop essential oils.

The second one was the bits melted and then whisked up as it started to set. So it became white.

I have plans of making some lip balm at some point but not sure when that will be.

I can’t remember if last time I said I’d won a book about making dolls. Well if I didn’t mention it I won one. I’ve also bought a kit so I can join some sew along sessions in YouTube. My sewing is crap but fingers crossed I’ll manage to get something from it.

I’ve also been doing a bit of jewellery making. Well making stitch markers for knitting. Not that hard really but it’s something else to do.

So looking at that lot I’ve had quite a few things to do. So maybe things aren’t that bad.

The biggest and most important thing though is that, please make sure you stay safe and healthy.

Love and light.

So this lockdown thing is getting boring now. Days were starting to merge beforehand but now everything is definitely becoming one. I’m also really sorry for not posting anything recently. No excuses, I just didn’t do it. I could blame the dog or something else but that would be lying.

I’m still working my way through my cardigan. Two fronts, the back and most of one sleeve now.

It’s coming along well but have to say sleeves seem to go on forever. It feels like I’ve been working on the first sleeve for about 6 weeks. (I may be over exaggerating but that’s what it feels like).

I made a start on Jane the Pangolin the other day. I did that to just break up the monotony of the sleeve. I haven’t finished it yet but she has a body, a head, 2 ears and 2 back legs. I’ll stuff them and see them all up at some point in the future.

What else have I been up to? Well craft wise it’s just been the cardigan and the pangolin, nothing else. I’ve been getting into aromatherapy recently to. I think I mentioned using essential oils to keep the bugs away last time, can’t remember though but that’s what I’ve been using.

At the moment I have a diffuser pumping out a blend of cinnamon, eucalyptus, sandalwood and lavender. It’s smells good and it’s making me feel chilled so no worries.

I made up a blend for anxiety in a little roller bottle the other day. That smells really nice, it’s cleansing, comforting and it helps me get out of the panic, stresses and worry. I’ll share the recipe with you. Just remember, if you use it and it helps spare a thought for me. I seem to love it but if I start using it I struggle to stop almost to the point that I could shower in it. Here is the recipe:

• 12 drops Cosmic Cleaner
• 6 drops Sweet orange
• 6 drops Neroli
• 6 drops Bergamot
• 6 drops Lemon
• 3 drops Rosewood
• 3 drops Frankincense
• 3 drops Lavender
• 3 drops Clary Sage
• Top up with Sweet Almond Oil

Cosmic cleaner is a gem essence I came up with in 2006/7 and it’s still going strong. I’ve gone through a few dosage bottles but the stock and mother bottles are still fine. It is great for cleansing and charging things energetically just like the name suggests. Here is the recipe for that

Quite a few powerful crystals there but that should explain why it’s the way it is. And if you’re interested it works out as 12 drops from the mother bottle to the stock bottle and twelve drops to the dosage bottle. And each dose is 12 drops. It’s good stuff.

That reminds me that over the past few weeks I’ve made another gem essence. This one is called Stop, as the name suggests it’s a strong essence for protection. I made it with Black Tourmaline and Selenite in a clear quartz essence bowl on a Selenite plate in a pyramid surrounded by Selenite wands.

That one worked out as 3 drops down to stock and dosage and then 3 drops from the dosage bottle to another bottle. This bottle had the 3 dosage drops and some essential oils and the bottle topped up with water. The oils I used were:

• Clove Bud
• Sage
• Bay Laurel
• Black Pepper
• Lemon

All that one takes is just one drop at a stopping place (where you want things to stop and go no further). That’s where the name Stop came from. It’s very potent and protective and works wonders for stoping anything negative from passing. One drop at doors and windows keeps you safe and secure.

The only other thing I can think of that I’ve done was clean my room. Anyway hope you all stay safe and well. Spare a thought for people around you that may be lonely. I know we’re all supposed to be socially distancing but there are other ways you can reach out. Drop them a message or a letter, or give them a call. Now is a time for distancing ourselves and for coming together and working for the good of all.

There are a few utter twatwaffle turnip sucking troglodytes out there that are continuing to go out and spread this disease about and they should all be ashamed of them selves, they’ll be the first to moan if they lose someone close but I’m not sure even if that will hit the message home to them.

Anyway sod them and their selfish ways, big love to one and all, stay safe and

LOVE AND LIGHT.

Well I’ve been in lockdown now for about a week. Most of it through choice. It looks like I could be here for some time yet.

This thing is scary enough as it is but I’m in the vulnerable group so I better make myself comfy as I’ll be here for a fair while.

With the vulnerable group thing I’m not even sure if I’m supposed to be in it or not. I got a text message today saying I need to stay in. But other people have got the same message. That came from the government so I felt important for all of three minutes.

If you’re in the vulnerable group you’re supposed to hear from the government either by text, over the phone or by post. I’ve only had the same text that other people have had and nothing else. Some people have received things that say specifically that they are in this group. The stuff online seems to contradict itself or it might just be the way I’m reading it. Time will tell though.

I had my monthly blood test done today and the lady that did it was amazing. I get them done at home now which is good because it means I do t have to go into a hospital. Hospitals aren’t exactly amazing at the best of times but at the moment I’m guessing they aren’t that safe. So the lady that came today was really nice and friendly and when she said “sharp scratch”, it was actually true and it was a scratch and not a stab. As blood tests are a monthly thing at the moment and will be for the next couple of years if they carry on like that I can’t complain. Another first for today was I actually watched the process rather than having to look away. Go me.

I might have a few piercings and a couple of tattoos but I normally have to look away for injections and blood tests. I must be getting all butch and stuff. First time for that in a while.

So during this lockdown I’m managing to focus on knitting, crocheting, kumihimo and a few other crafty bits.

Knitting- my cardigan is coming along slowly but it’s getting there. I finished the back and am working on one of the fronts. It had to take a back seat for a bit though while I did something for Mother’s Day.

Crochet- this is where a lot of my focus has been recently. For Mother’s Day I decided to crochet something. I crocheted a Black Labrador for my mum. She liked it and when I put it on different groups on Facebook there has been a great reaction.

As far as crochet goes Toft patterns are awesome for toys. I have the two menagerie books, the birds book, the dogs book, the sheep book, the dinosaurs book, the imaginarium (monsters) and the dolls book. I really would recommend them if you want to make toys. They also have patterns for other animals that aren’t in the book but you can only get them in packs with the wool. I have Jane the Pangolin, Ron the horseshoe crab and Orla the octopus. I got the pattern and the wool for these and it’s real wool. When they’re done I’ll put pictures up.

You can get the books, patterns and wool from:

https://www.edwardscrochet.com/home.aspx

Kumihimo- I’ve got a pattern and that’s about it. I’m going to make a glasses chain with anchors for my mum. But it’s going to be blue and white. It should look good when it’s done.

Arts and crafts wise that’s about it.

Last week Zoe had her bits done so she’s feeling all sad, mopey and sorry for herself. All she wants to do is play, run and jump about but she’s not allowed. She was sent home with a cone of shame but it stayed on for all of 10 seconds. So we ordered a suit for her. It would be really funny if a dog had to wear a dinner jacket, shirt and bow tie but no. It’s a suit that stops them biting, licking and chewing the scar area. It’s better that the cone but I do t think she really likes wearing it.

Training is on hold though until she gets better and back to normal.

I seem to be really getting into essential oils at the moment. Think it’s partly because of this virus/disease thing and the fact they smell great. I don’t really know much about them but I’m using one that are supposed to be antiviral, antifungal and antibacterial. If they help keep germs at bay great but if not there is a nice relaxing smell.

The lock down has affected some things but for others it’s just meant things need to change. With the development group we haven’t been able to meet up in person but we had a great session tonight using WhatsApp. We did some healing and sent it to a central focus point which is a crystal grid I made. Had it as a focus point so it’s easier to direct healing to that rather than have it flying about. The grid is set up to send healing to where ever it needs to go.

You can also send love, light and healing to the grid if you wish. Just picture the grid and send your energy to it.

The other thing we did in the group was to try some remote viewing. I held something and the rest of the group linked in to me and tried to figure out what I was hold. This worked well is some respects but there is still work to be done. Everyone that tried it got something. The issue being that most people didn’t get what I was holding but got other things in the room I was in. But was still a great job by everyone involved. Everyone got something out of the session which means it’s always worth it.

One more thing, why the hell are people putting themselves and others in serious danger. I just don’t get it. I really think a lot of people are just stupidly selfish. Someone from our house has had to move out, all because she wouldn’t follow the rules and was putting the rest of the household in serious danger. She didn’t realise or care that if she brought the virus into the house that it could kill me, mum and dad. It’s far more important to ignore the rules and do what you want. Crazy Sea Snails, sea snails are shellfish, covered in a shell so can put up with a lot of crap and are just slimy vile disgusting things. Just like the people who put everyone else at risk. Selfish shellfish. Follow the rules you crazy bunch or arseholes.

Right everyone please please please stay in and stay safe and follow the instructions from the government.

Love and light.

So it’s been 2 weeks since my last post. I’m sorry for not boring you with insane ramblings.

Recently I’ve found some horror films that I like. They are quite old but think there quite good. Hammer Horror and some others. Basically it’s films with Peter Cushing in. They aren’t really that scary but the stories aren’t too bad, they’re good to have on while I’m doing my knitting.

As you know my memory is crap so I can’t really remember the list of films but I know I started with Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter. And the most recent was The Abominable Snowman. I’ve enjoyed them all.

I’m also trudging my way through Bones the tv series. I’m liking that too.

With the knitting I’m still working on my cardigan. It’s coming along slowly but getting there. Had knitting today too, I can’t say it enough how much I love my Sunday afternoon knitting sessions. I just love the people and how chilled it is. It’s like a great afternoon with friends. Because of everything that’s going on in the world and having no idea when the next Sunday knitting session will be I gave them all a crystal.

I charged the crystal with love, light, reiki and Karuna. I programmed the crystals to look after my friends and to keep them safe and healthy. Next Sunday is Mother’s Day so no session then which is fair enough but with all the talk of over 70s and vulnerable people having to isolate themselves I don’t know when we’ll be back together for a session. If they have to stop I’m really going to miss them. I just hope it doesn’t happen but everyone should stay safe.

I do think that all the hand washing will do some good. The other day a friend said something funny when we were talking about panic but toilet rolls. Then and now no one really knows why people are panic buying loo rolls but she said “it’s because when someone coughs everyone shits themselves”. It just made me chuckle.

This whole thing isn’t doing my anxiety any good though. It is worrying but we just have to do everything we can to stay safe and healthy. And I wish you all the same.

So the projects I have planned are:

• Crochet Pangolin
• Crochet Octopus
• Crochet Horseshoe Crab
• Finish my cardigan
• And maybe one or two other things

Was at church last night. I didn’t get any messages lol but I gave a few. I ended up doing the service with Bob. I got some good feedback though so that’s another boost for the confidence. Had the church agm last week too. That was interesting.

So I’ll just get on with my knitting and leave you to it.

Love and light.

Are we in the midsts of a zombie apocalypse? The news seems to be making it out to be one. They seem to be making this thing really really scary.

I know it’s pretty serious but is it as bad as people are making out? It’s almost as if the world is coming to an end or something.

Yes I have anxiety, but because of all the focus on this it’s makes me feel worse. I’m just trying to remember the numbers involved. From what I can tell you have more chance of catching and dying from the flu or being hit by a bus than you have of getting this coronavirus. Covid19, we may as well say it. “Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself” – JK Rowling.

The focus on washing your hands is good and I honestly feel it won’t just reduce the risk of catching Covid19 but it should help reduce the risk of getting other things too.

I am trying to not be scared of it but all the focus being on it makes it hard to do. I’m washing my hands a lot but I’ve been doing that since the Lemtrada treatment anyway. I have my salt lamps on, an air filter/ioniser blowing awayand an essential oil diffuser going which should help keep the air virus and bacteria free.

If you’re interested the oils I’m using are:

Eucalyptus, cinnamon, lemongrass, tea tree, peppermint, pine, sandalwood and some menthol liquid.

All of which are antiviral, antibacterial and anti fungal to some degree some do all and some do some. But they smell nice and help with congestion and should also stop any other lurgy that’s floating about.

I do know that if it was a zombie apocalypse I’d be safe. Having a messed up scarred brain and spine has to have some benefits.

That’s enough about that and let’s move on to something completely different…… well the other stuff I’ve been up to.

No crochet still focused on knitting my cardigan/jacket thing. Still on the back at the moment and in the process of decreasing for the raglan. I’ve been making quite a few pom-poms for an MS craft evening some grey, a few white and some yellow. I’ve got to decide on a toy or 2 to make for the jubilee centre summer do.

I’ve got some other MS stuff I have to do like a new leaflet, a newsletter and a couple of other bits.

Other craft stuff I’ve been up to is some kumihimo, a bit of marbling and sewing up a pouch for ribbons.

I’ve also become addicted to Thornton’s special toffee and treacle toffee. It’s nice and that’s all I’m saying about it.

Mum is getting better, slowly and surely but she’s getting there. She now has a salt lamp and an essential oil diffuser in her room so that should help her. I keep sending her healing and ask you to do the same. I spent time last week actually giving her reiki. It’s been a while since I’ve done some hands on healing and it was great.i enjoyed it and so did she. I am sending a lot of reiki out all over the world at the moment to help people affected by the coronavirus, the hospital and medical staff and the Scientists. Big love and support goes out to them all.

So make sure you wash your hands properly to keep the zombies away.

Love and light.

Recently I’ve been completely losing track of time. I’m getting well and truly confused about what day it is and what time it feels like. I’m ignoring dates as that’s something that went a long time ago. Or it could have been last week but as everything is merging together I’m not really sure.

Earlier I thought it was Tuesday today but it’s not it’s only Monday. Last week o spent most of the week thinking it was Friday but it only felt like Monday. I’m confused enough as it is but adding this to the list it’s just makes it more and more confusing.

Confusion is fun fun fun.

So didn’t make it to knitting group on Tuesday or Friday last week because of rubbish weather and other appointments. Some good things did happen last week though. After a little work and help from mum and dad I finally got my finances organised. Well mainly mum and dad sorted things out because that’s what they do. The confusion makes things like this pretty awkward and difficult. I need things explaining in different ways and it takes a bit to get my head round things but we get there eventually.

So no knitting during the week. But went back on Sunday. I really love my Sunday knitting sessions. I’m still working on my cardigan/jacket thing. I’m working on the back and the pattern section at the moment. Still have a fair way to go though but again I’ll get there in the end.

Thats all about it knitting wise. I have started working on a knotted friendship bracelet.

I tried following other patterns but they didn’t work out and I couldn’t get them working. So for the moment I’ll stick to ones like in the picture or kumihimo bracelets.

I did the development group again at weekend and that went really well. We had a healing night and sent focused healing to the healing book and to others. We used crystals, meditation and a few other healing techniques. I enjoyed it and the other people involved did too.

Short and sweet update today but love and light.

This is a bit of an odd question. First thought was yes. If you compare people like Hittler and The Dalai Lama, obviously the Dalai Lama comes out on top and is the better person. So yes, some people are better than others. This works out if you look at extremes like in the example.

Things starts to fall down though when you look at normal people like you and me. Yes I’d love to say I’m better than you, but it’s bullshit. I believe all people are equal.

By classing everyone as equal makes a mess of the example I gave earlier. Do you break things down into parts and say you’re equal because of this, this and that but because of that you aren’t equal any more? Or is everyone really equal despite what they do or have done? Or are some people more equal than others?

Things are a bit tough when you start looking into them. If you really look into it and break them down there are always pros and cons.

For me this is where free will comes in to it. I like to think that everyone really is equal but they choose which way to go and what to do (that’s the free Will part). Everyone is equal and judged on their actions. But no matter what they do or who they are, they should be judged fairly and the same as everyone else.

I don’t care if you are a world famous superstar or a street sweeper if you do something wrong you should be judge appropriately and equally.

From a spiritualist point of view I feel this takes into account some of the 7 Principles. The Brotherhood of man, personal responsibility and compensation and retribution hereafter for all the good and evil deeds done on earth.

The brotherhood of man (no sexism intended) to me is all about equality. everyone is equal and no one is more equal than anyone else. Everyone should be treated the same, with love, respect and light.

Personal responsibility is you take responsibility for your own actions. You choose what you do and which path you follow.

The compensation and retribution thing is more about what happens in the next world when you’ve crossed over. Yes you are judged there by the hardest possible judge (yourself) but I like to think Karma comes in here to. What goes around comes around. What you send out comes back to you.

I think I’ve waffled on enough about that. What do you think?

So now for my update about what I’ve been doing and what’s been going on.

So mum came home and out of hospital on Wednesday. Chest infection hit her quite badly. I’ve told the people at knitting about what’s been going on with her. We all think a hospital stay is a bit excessive to get out of carrying on with her jumper but she doesn’t do anything by half.

I’ve been carrying on with my jumper/cardigan thing. On the stripe colour change section at the moment. It’s going well and people have said it’s looking neat. That was a bit of a boost.

I haven’t done any crochet as I’ve been focused on my cardigan. I have been playing with the marbling kit though. I did some marbling with Harvey today and he did some little wooden leaves and they looked quite cool. I did have to order some paper though. I had a look and the marbling people suggest using at least 160 gsm paper to print on. The stuff I was using was only 75. I know gsm means grams per square meter but other that that I have no idea what it actually means. I’m guessing it’s something to do with the quality of the paper but I’m not sure.

I can’t remember if I mentioned needle felting stones last week or not but when I was doing that I stabbed my finger and it’s still sore over a week later. I did break a needle or two and end up with bits sticking out of my finger so I’m not really surprised it’s still sore.

This week I’ll still be focused on my cardigan but I have a few appointments to go to. There will be church on Tuesday night, the gong bath on Wednesday and Saturday there’s development group followed by the Devine service.

Tuesdays service should be good though, Fi Nicks is on and I like the last service she did.

The development group I have ideas of what to do but they could change. Lots of different ideas but nothing is set yet. I’m leaving most of it up to spirit and I know they won’t let me down.

Right, back to the knitting,

Love and light,

Today has been a weird long and sometimes scary day. Last night I slept like shit which made today feel even longer and harder.

Today I ordered a new car. That in itself is quite confusing at the best of times but when I was tired and confused it was hellish. Most of the time I was struggling with not having a clue what the hell was going on. But mum and dad were with me and I trust them to make sure everything was ok, was right and above board.

It’s a mobility car so I suppose that makes things a bit easier. Or it’s supposed to anyway. But mum and dad said it was ok and like I said I trust them. This is what it should look like:

It should be fun and exciting anyway. Not that I know what’s really going on.

Pain has been around to today which has added to the fun.

The shocking and scary part of today is that my mum has had to be taken to hospital. She was having breathing issues and hasn’t been feeling that well for a couple of days.

Admittedly though my breathing has been off recently to. My puffers don’t have a clue what’s happening to them, they’ve been used quite a bit.

She’s been through A and E and it looks like she picked up a chest infection. They are keeping her in tonight and pumping her withIV antibiotics and other fluids. From a breathing point of view they’ve given her a nebuliser. She has puffers but because she was having issues with breathing she couldn’t use them properly so they weren’t helping or working the way they should.

I have to focus on the fact she’s in the right place and people are there to help her and get her sorted out.

So I didn’t spend the night stressing and worrying Katie took me to her house in an attempt to distract me. It helped a bit I have to say but at home now where my head can run wild. And it is running wild.

It’s all going through my head, I’ve got the car thing and worrying if I’ve made the right decision (I was like that before the messed up brain) there is the worrying about mum and all the hell from that is going on too. I’m hot, tired, dizzy and in pain. That’s all on top of the shit running through my head.

Ok it’s time to change the subject in an attempt to distract myself from the worrying.

Yesterday was a good day too. Knitting is back on. I’ve started a new projects. I’m making myself a cardigan thing to slob about in. At first I saw some wool that I thought about doing it in. Then I added it all up and decided paying £60+ for wool for a jumper thing that I’m only going to slob about in is stupidly outrageous. So I went for some basic wool and with the use of a voucher it came to a grand total of £7.80. Which I think is pretty good especially when I was thinking it would be closer to £30 if not more. So far I’ve only managed to do 3 rows but I’ll get there. I’m determined that this is going to be my major project focus.

There will be other things that come along but that’s just me liking to flit about. It reduces the boredom and monotony.

Friday afternoon I was doing some needle felting. Something simple like stones. Sounds easy huh? Let’s just say it caused me pain. I accidentally ended up stabbing my finger. I did it not once, not twice but 3 times. The first two hurt a bit but nothing new the 3rd one was really painful and ended up going quite deep. That one has caused some lingering pain. It’s still sore. When I did it the needle actually broke. I was worried that it had broken off in my finger but had Katie check it and she decided there was noting in the wound. So there is part of a needle floating about somewhere. So I had to order a few more needles to replace the broken ones.

Another fun thing happened yesterday. I did a Facebook live stream of mediumship. Wasn’t picking people to read for it was just opening up and seeing who came through. It was all in the hands of spirit, it was hard work and tiring but I enjoyed it and other people did too. That was fun.

Saturday night was development group and church, got some great and lovely feedback from that too. Was told that people enjoyed and got something from the sessions I was doing. That was a great boost.

There will be other things that have happened but I can’t think of them right now. All I ask is please send out some love, light and healing for my mum and anyone else that may need it.

Love and light…….