So it’s official. I have changed my religion. I am now a spiritualist. Last night I became a member of Bury Spiritualist Centre that is part of the SNU (spiritualist national union). I’m also a provisional individual member of the SNU. The full membership will come later on after an interview and some other bits.

The SNU and spiritualist religion really speaks to me and makes sense. It fits with my way of thinking and isn’t full of dogma like other religions. Dogma does my nut in even though it is one of my favourite films and has the immortal Metatron played by Alan Rickman.

Awesome film, it’s just a shame it isn’t available to download from anywhere.

So as I was saying last night I became a member of the Spiritualist church in Bury. Last night they had a remembrance service and a members service. The remembrance part was really nice and I learnt some new things from it about the wars. Have to admit I always feel a bit uncomfortable when remembrance comes round. I do remember all of those who were and are affected by war, those members of the armed forces past and present and members of the emergency services. I try to observe the silences and send out love, gratitude and healing during them. I feel uncomfortable during this time because of the needless waste of life that was and is caused by war. I will never forget the sacrifice that was made and is being made so I can be me and live the way I want to.

The members bit of the service wasn’t really what I expected. I didn’t really know what to expect but it was nice. There were a couple of us taking part and all we had to do was repeat an oath and sign a book. It was a nice way though to declare you are a follower of a religion.

I did cause trouble the other day though on Facebook. It was completely unintentional, someone posted a story about an old man teaching people the meaning of a poppy and how they should be worn. At first I added a comment saying I thought people in the forces wore the poppy differently to other people. Then it made me think so I did a bit of digging on the British Legion Website. I found out that there is no wrong or right way to wear one it just says that if you wear a poppy it should be worn with pride. I thought that was nice so I shared it on the post. It was doing this that caused the issue. The person who put up the post decided I was trying to refute the message. I said I wasn’t and it made me think and want to find out more. So, I just shared my findings.

Other things that have happened are the dog savaging my hands. She was only playing though so no real issues. My hands have become extremely dry, I think it’s down to the excess washing and the chemicals (cleaning stuff) I’ve had to use to clean up after the dog. Lots of poops and pee pees. Training has been coming along still trying to work on leave it and lie down. It’s slow but we’re getting there.

Crochet wise still working on the rabbit, on the fourth leg now and that just leaves the tail, stuffing and sewing up. Also still going strong with the felt pebbles/stones. That’s it really craft wise. Next think though will be a large sheep. Just for fun.

The other thing I noticed when reposting an earlier post that didn’t show for some reason on Facebook was that I seem to have a habit of starting post with “this week has been a bit of a whirlwind” so after noticing that, I’ve tried to change it.

What else is/has been going on? I now have blue and violet hair. That’s fun, it looks cool.

Shit picture but may give you some of an idea.

What else? Sweets and stuff, I’ve started hording crisps and sweets again but have to hide them now so the dog doesn’t get them.

MS stuff, had two meetings last week, one was the drop in, the other an online meeting. Both went well and relationships with other people in the group are getting better and better. I’m still playing with crystals, reiki, source and Karuna. The dog is getting lots of healing but think she likes it so all is good. I have to say I am tempted to give her an atunement or 3 but not sure yet. It might happen but only if it’s right to do it. The world of spirit and the dog will let me know when and if it’s right to do it.

That’s it really. I’m feeling tired at the moment but that means I’ll probably be up til like 6 or something. I have a flu jab tomorrow and I think a pneumonia one to so that’s an earlyish start. The dog will probably get me up anyway.

Right time to put some more working hand cream on and go up stair.

Good night and love and light.

Just noticed this original post doesn’t seem to show properly.

Last week we got a dog. She is absolutely amazing and so cute.

Her full name is Zoe Nanna. I don’t believe that my dad finally caved. Let’s just say my mum has been laying it on pretty thick for a while now.

So last week my sister said that her friend was selling some labradoodle puppies. It was shocking that my dad said find out how much they were. So mum tasked Katie with the job of finding out. By the time she did they had all gone. They did however have a 1 year old brown lab that they we giving away for free. The video that was sent through showed a cute lovely dog. He was free because when he was a baby he was bitten and lost part of his lip. Still cute though. It just looked a bit like he was snarling because of the injury. Mum was all for it until she stopped and thought about it. Because he lived outside on a farm she thought it wouldn’t be nice or fair to go from that amount of freedom to being confined. So he was out.

Then she was trawling through a puppy buying website (No idea which one). She came across someone that had some puppies out towards Bolton. So she got in contact with the lady who said she only had 3 girls left. Mum was organising a trip out to see them the next day. Then all of a sudden she got a message saying we could go over then. So 9pm Wednesday evening mad rush round to get re dressed (out of slobby shorts) and start the family trip over to Kersley. We eventually found the house and went in.

3 8 week old puppies bouncing about playing and living life. The parents were outside. So a little bit of play with the puppies. Some of us were saying let’s have all three. One for me, one for mum and one for Leah. This time dad put his foot down and said no. Eventually one puppy spent time with mum and spent time with me having cuddles when I had to sit down. So the decision was made.

So we picked Zoe Nanna. The name she was given was Cyan. We were going to change her name anyway. Before we went to look at the puppies we discussed names. I wanted to call the dog Nanook after the dog in Lost Boys:

Different breed and sex but hey it’s a cool dog. Mum wasn’t a fan of that name but thought of Nanna after the dog in Peter Pan. I was hooked and thought great name for a dog.

Then some boring fart said it would cause confusion when Harvey was round. For him my mum is Nannan. So the dog would get really really confused not knowing if she was being shouted for or my mum was. We went to see the puppies and after we picked mum and dad decided on the name Zoe. Zoe was the name of a dog mum and dad had a long long time ago. When I was a baby she went to live with my nana and grandad because I tortured the poor animal. (Don’t remember any of it and it won’t have been out of nastiness). So Zoe was the name for the dog and because I’m awkward she got a full Sunday name of Zoe Nanna.

She has been looking after me and I’ve been looking after her. She spent her first night in my room.

She had a bit of an accident on my bed and peed but oh well shit happens. Night two she spent with Leah and she spent time arguing with the dog in the mirror. But she’s now moved into my room and spending her nights with me.

The other night she did trap us in my room. She pooped behind the door so I couldn’t fully open it. So 4 am had to call the house phone to ask mum and dad to pas some cleaning stuff through the tiny space I could open it. Cleaned that up and went back to bed. So those that know me yes I am cleaning up poo and I’m not gagging! Whoop whoop go me!!!!! So last few nights have been disturbed getting Zoe on and off the bed and cleaning up. But last night she was awesome, she got on and off the bed on her own and popped on the mats without waking me up.

I’ve ordered some clickers to start some proper training. We did a bit yesterday where she would touch one hand and get a treat from the other. It sort of worked. Last night though she had a few trips outside, only round the house though. She has only had one lot of injections so she’s not fully ready for walks yet. It was funny because if the was somewhere she wanted to go she would and if there was somewhere she didn’t want to go she wouldn’t.

We went to the vets yesterday morning for her first check up and lot of injections. She was ace and no problems at all. While we were in the waiting room though I saw another dog do something that I had only heard of in comedies. Where they stop and won’t go anywhere near the vet. It was a big dog, a collie I think but no idea, it just stopped and would not go anywhere. The owner had to pick it up and carry it in. Smallish lady carrying a big dog, bit of a funny sight.

Haven’t been able to do much knitting, felting or crocheting because I’m not sure how the dog with be with the wool. I don’t want her to trash any of it. But I’m starting a bunny out of Jane C Brett Flutterby. It’s the furry type of wool stuff that I made the aardvark out of. So now that’s just being done and knit and natter even though it’s crochet.

But really shocked by the likes and comments from the last post. Thank you to everyone.

Keep bigging it up and loving life and puppies.

Love and light.

So this last week there have been MS team meetings and other sessions. There has been dog training and playing with Zoe. Psychic stuff and development things. Church stuff, friend stuff and to top it all off hospital trips.

Have to say though that the hospital trips haven’t been for me. Mum hasn’t been too well again. She woke me up the other day to say that Sam was taking her to a and e. That’s quite shocking in its self. When she woke me though she didn’t sound too bad so I wasn’t as worried as I have been in the past.

So she went to hospital and dad spent the day running round after people and trying to keep people up to date with what’s going on. At the time the hospital people thought my mum may have embolisms in her lungs left over from the pneumonia. She went for a CT scan today and it turns out that there are no embolisms so it’s just a chest infections. So lots of antibiotics and healing and she should be right as rain and back to normal soon. So anyone reading this please spare a thought and send my mum some healing.

Knitting and crochet wise I haven’t really been able to do much because of the dog. I’ve been working on the rabbit for my sister and that’s all. I managed to spend a bit of time yesterday and I managed to get one ear finished and start another but that’s all.

When it comes to Zoe that is where most of my time has been spent. We’ve learnt to sit, to pee on mats and sort of come here. She can do stairs on her own now so she doesn’t need to be carried which makes things easier for all of us. We’ve been working on lye down and fetch. She did manage to scare me shirtless the other day though. She was playing and got a bit bitey. She was snapping and my anxiety kicked in. She does get a bit giddy with playing sometimes and snappy and she tries to bite a lot of things. But like I said the anxiety kicked in and I just lost it. I took her down stairs handed her to my mum and said we are getting a crate for her. Then I went back upstairs, hid in my room and cried tears of fear for a bit. The next day though all was well and we were good friends again. Training has been coming along with her which is good, I do get a bit frustrated at times but that’s because she doesn’t do things straight away. I know that’s my issue not hers and I just need to learn to be more patient with her.

I am typing this though with her lay across me snoring he head off.

She has been getting lots of reiki, Karuna and source healing and she seems to really like that. There have been no bed accidents since the first night either so that’s good too.

Development group wise things aren’t going to bad there either. The last session at weekend was really quiet though. We did do some work and because there was only a few of us and all of us use reiki it helped to work with that and I think with some of the group members we started something really useful and helped them get somewhere and gave them a good start.

This is the last week though of officially having no religion. This coming Saturday I’m taking part in a members service at the local church and that means I will officially become a spiritualist. It’s a bit strange because a few years ago I didn’t think any religion would be for me and I was doing my own thing. I disliked Christianity because they seem to think I am evil because of who I love. (Everyone by the way) but I am GAY and there is nothing wrong with that. At first I thought spiritualism was an off shoot of Christianity so wasn’t really a fan. But when looking into it deeper it isn’t and it’s a whole religion of its own. The 7 principles ring true for me, there doesn’t seem to be any dogma, and the fact I speak to and work with people who have crossed over isn’t evil or doing the devils work, it’s all good. Working with the light and being me work with the religion so I like it and it works.

I’m not really sure what will happen in the members service, but I know spirit wouldn’t let anything bad happen. So it’s another step on my journey.

Back to the development group, I wanted to start work on something with the group. I wanted to start what I call a good vibe bowl. It’s a bit like the Snap cup from legally blond 2. So it’s full of really great and uplifting messages that can be pulled from when you need a little pick me up. The 3 of us that were there thought it was a good idea but because there was so few it wasn’t really worth starting so it will be one for another session.

That’s about it for now but there will definitely be another post about how things go at church on Saturday next week.

Love and light.

Last week we got a dog. She is absolutely amazing and so cute.

Her full name is Zoe Nanna. I don’t believe that my dad finally caved. Let’s just say my mum has been laying it on pretty thick for a while now.

So last week my sister said that her friend was selling some labradoodle puppies. It was shocking that my dad said find out how much they were. So mum tasked Katie with the job of finding out. By the time she did they had all gone. They did however have a 1 year old brown lab that they we giving away for free. The video that was sent through showed a cute lovely dog. He was free because when he was a baby he was bitten and lost part of his lip. Still cute though. It just looked a bit like he was snarling because of the injury. Mum was all for it until she stopped and thought about it. Because he lived outside on a farm she thought it wouldn’t be nice or fair to go from that amount of freedom to being confined. So he was out.

Then she was trawling through a puppy buying website (No idea which one). She came across someone that had some puppies out towards Bolton. So she got in contact with the lady who said she only had 3 girls left. Mum was organising a trip out to see them the next day. Then all of a sudden she got a message saying we could go over then. So 9pm Wednesday evening mad rush round to get re dressed (out of slobby shorts) and start the family trip over to Kersley. We eventually found the house and went in.

3 8 week old puppies bouncing about playing and living life. The parents were outside. So a little bit of play with the puppies. Some of us were saying let’s have all three. One for me, one for mum and one for Leah. This time dad put his foot down and said no. Eventually one puppy spent time with mum and spent time with me having cuddles when I had to sit down. So the decision was made.

So we picked Zoe Nanna. The name she was given was Cyan. We were going to change her name anyway. Before we went to look at the puppies we discussed names. I wanted to call the dog Nanook after the dog in Lost Boys:

Different breed and sex but hey it’s a cool dog. Mum wasn’t a fan of that name but thought of Nanna after the dog in Peter Pan. I was hooked and thought great name for a dog.

Then some boring fart said it would cause confusion when Harvey was round. For him my mum is Nannan. So the dog would get really really confused not knowing if she was being shouted for or my mum was. We went to see the puppies and after we picked mum and dad decided on the name Zoe. Zoe was the name of a dog mum and dad had a long long time ago. When I was a baby she went to live with my nana and grandad because I tortured the poor animal. (Don’t remember any of it and it won’t have been out of nastiness). So Zoe was the name for the dog and because I’m awkward she got a full Sunday name of Zoe Nanna.

She has been looking after me and I’ve been looking after her. She spent her first night in my room.

She had a bit of an accident on my bed and peed but oh well shit happens. Night two she spent with Leah and she spent time arguing with the dog in the mirror. But she’s now moved into my room and spending her nights with me.

The other night she did trap us in my room. She pooped behind the door so I couldn’t fully open it. So 4 am had to call the house phone to ask mum and dad to pas some cleaning stuff through the tiny space I could open it. Cleaned that up and went back to bed. So those that know me yes I am cleaning up poo and I’m not gagging! Whoop whoop go me!!!!! So last few nights have been disturbed getting Zoe on and off the bed and cleaning up. But last night she was awesome, she got on and off the bed on her own and popped on the mats without waking me up.

I’ve ordered some clickers to start some proper training. We did a bit yesterday where she would touch one hand and get a treat from the other. It sort of worked. Last night though she had a few trips outside, only round the house though. She has only had one lot of injections so she’s not fully ready for walks yet. It was funny because if the was somewhere she wanted to go she would and if there was somewhere she didn’t want to go she wouldn’t.

We went to the vets yesterday morning for her first check up and lot of injections. She was ace and no problems at all. While we were in the waiting room though I saw another dog do something that I had only heard of in comedies. Where they stop and won’t go anywhere near the vet. It was a big dog, a collie I think but no idea, it just stopped and would not go anywhere. The owner had to pick it up and carry it in. Smallish lady carrying a big dog, bit of a funny sight.

Haven’t been able to do much knitting, felting or crocheting because I’m not sure how the dog with be with the wool. I don’t want her to trash any of it. But I’m starting a bunny out of Jane C Brett Flutterby. It’s the furry type of wool stuff that I made the aardvark out of. So now that’s just being done and knit and natter even though it’s crochet.

But really shocked by the likes and comments from the last post. Thank you to everyone.

Keep bigging it up and loving life and puppies.

Love and light.

Oh my god. I haven’t posted anything for about 2 weeks.

I’m sorry.

Have to say though things haven’t been that great for me. Today has been the worst though. Today I feel absolutely crap, loads of pain, fatigue and dizziness. The dizziness has been the worst I’ve had for a while. Every slight movement, even closing my eyes sends my head spinning. So I’m moving extra slowly, oh the joys with that. I feel like I look like I’m in my 90s.

I woke up this morning not having a clue what day it was, where I was and what was going on. That’s fun, just imagine yourself like that. It isn’t nice. Then to top it all off you feel like you’ve been drinking far to much.

Anyway I’m still here and fighting. What’s been going on for the last 2 weeks. Let’s start with knitting and crochet. Recently knitting wise I’ve been carrying on with my baby blanket. That’s coming along slowly. I enjoy doing it but every time I pick it up I get distracted after a couple of rows.

Crochet has been a different story though. I’ve completed 3 animals. A bunny, a fox and an aardvark. I think they look really cool. What do you think?

The other week I went with my mum to man a stand at Oldham Royal Hospital for baby loss awareness week. The subject of the stand isn’t really that nice to think about but it’s something that happens and people need to know about it. On that stand there were different things that the midwives give to mothers how have lost a baby. There were some really tiny baby hats. So there I am sat in a busy part of a hospital counting the stitches. Then once I figured that out I started knitting. So there is now another hat to add to the collection. It’s tiny but cute and hope it helps some families to heal:

as it was baby loss awareness week it finished off with a wave of light. I didn’t go to the garden with my sister, parents and nephew but I went to church and joined in the wave of light there. I have the candle going before and during the service.

yes it’s an electric candle but due to insurance rule it couldn’t be a real candle. I wanted to leave it there but was told it’s likely to end up going walkies due to other people that use the building. It’s sad but safer to be at home.

I’ve done some felting too. I’ve made quite a few wet felted balls, that’s just because. I’ve also made a seal. as it’s Halloween in a few days I made a banner with ghosts, pumpkins and a bat.

they’re small but cute. I also made a larger pumpkin that’s blowing raspberries to all the bad juju that’s about at the moment.

Spicy food has also been a bane for me. I love spicy food and food with lots of flavour but I can’t eat it anymore. It physically hurts my mouth so I’ve had to stop. Bland food is boring.

I went to a gong bath last week to. I love them and they make me feel so much better.

Obviously I’ve been to church aswell. Saturday just gone was development group. I ran the session, there was a new member too. I think though that everyone that went got something from the session so that’s always great. We did some energy work, talked about opening and closing, how to stop others impacting or stealing your energy and also how shapes impact you. So I got out my Platonic solids and got the group to change the shape of there energy field to the shape they picked and then say how it made them feel. So yeah think people that were there got something from it.

I asked the new person what she thought and she said she enjoyed it so all is good.

Anxiety has been playing up recently to. I’m fighting it but finding it hard to control. I know most of the things that set it off are stupid but that doesn’t stop it happening.

I also got the date for my members service. Only a couple of weeks to go but that will be the next step on that journey.

I bought something online today. I bought a Turkish Drop spindle. So I can start spinning my own yarn. At the moment I’m thinking it could be time to spin my own yarn and then go on to knit it or create something with that yarn. Been watching loads and loads and loads of YouTube videos on spinning yarn. It doesn’t look to hard but that mean it’s more than likely almost impossible. So a bit excited about that. It will be interesting either way.

I also think I’m going to have to do another bunny. That’s for my sister. She wants one in the same wooo I used for the aardvark. So that’s going to happen soon. The yarn is so soft and cuddly it’s awesome.

Have no idea why but I seem to be tensing my jaw and grinding my teeth today. I don’t realise I’m doing it at first but when I do it takes some real effort to stop. But confusion and dizziness have been the most annoying things recently.

The crochet pattern books I have are amazing the patterns all look cool and they aren’t really difficult. After my sister’s bunny I’ll have to decide what to do next. I’m thinking she at the moment but that could change.

Right I’ll leave you to your crazy lives. Big it up.

Love and light

So the last week has been a bit of a whirlwind in different ways.

Last week I started to crochet a bunny. I finished that on Monday:

With needle felting bees, pumpkins and ghosts:

Knitting and Macrame I made a bracelet:

the bracelet was like the one above but was black and white rather than colourful. The main issue with the one I made was that I used glue to finish of the ends and it made it look manky. I have since found out that the cord I used can be melted so I’ll use melting to finish it off next time. Someone saw the black and white one I made and said they wanted one. So I can make that and just make it neater than the original.

Last Tuesday I was at church and saw someone I haven’t seen in years. It was great. It’s someone called Jo that I used to dance with a long time ago. She never made it to the class I did because of other things she had going on. It was great to find out what she’s been up to and how she was. I also managed to get some healing that night too which is always good for a little boost. So that and seeing an old friend was a great little pick me up. It was well and truly needed. I’ve been a bit low recently due to pain and other things that seem to go through my head, most of them I know are stupid but can I stop thinking about them, NO!

I also found out last week the the mother and grandmother of some other friends had passed on. I felt for the family especially knowing what other things they had going on. It reminded me of the pain I felt when I lost my grandparents. It’s hard to deal with that sort of thing. I know they’re still around though so that helps. But lots of love and healing going out to the people who have lost loved ones.

Someone from America asked me the other day if I would make them a bunny and send it over. I didn’t think much of it at the time and said why not. The next day I looked up how much it would cost to make with the official wool the pattern suggest. I was shocked when I found out that a ball of that wool is £18. Yes £18, it must come from gold sheep or something. Just a tad pricey. The other think is it would cost about £30 to send over. So in total to make it and send it, it would cost nearly £60+ so after figuring that out I drop them a message saying no. Some a bit closer to home said to my sister they had seen what I had made and wanted a fox. So after knitting yesterday we took a quick trip to the wool shop to get some believe it or not wool.

it should look like that when it’s done. But using chunky wool that’s a bit more red. So far the body is made and I’m working on the head. I did start working on an aardvark for me with some grey fluffy wool, but that’s had to go on the back burner for a bit. The fox I think is going to end up with a kid eventually. Well that’s what I was told. If it does great but if not oh well.

I thought I lost a crystal the other week but that turned up and fell out of a pocket when I went to put my jacket on. So cool on that one. I knew it was in the house somewhere but where exactly I had no idea. I knew it would turn up when it felt like it and it did. So whoop for the no longer missing rock.

Had a couple of MS things, one Monday and one Tuesday. They went well and I won some chocolate last night so whooop. Mum won’t quite a bit of chocolate too but I’m eating it to help because she’s on a diet. Lol

I had some really good news the other day. The people from the spiritualist church asked me if I would take over the group. So wow on that one. It was completely un expected. I was covering the group that night but to take over for the foreseeable is really unexpected.

Another thing that seems to be happening at the moment is that so many people are talking about death. I’m finding it hard to listen to. It upsets me, it’s hard and I don’t like it.

Wow what a day. It’s been long, crafty, damp and woolly.

So today me and mum went to Yarndale. It was over in Skipton. As the name sounds it was all about wool. So it covered all sorts of woolly crafts. From spinning to felting and everything in between. So knitting and crochet, felting and luceting all cool different crafts or activities.

So today I got a few books:

Edwards Menagerie, The new collection.

This is a book full of crochet patterns of different animals.

I also got a book with Dinosaur Crochet patterns.

My mum wanted me to get the dogs book too. I thought o already had it but I was wrong. So fixed that with a quick amazon order. The one I got from the show though was signed by the author, so being a bit posh there and they said it isn’t due for release until later in the week so that’s another one up.

I got another book about needle felting called Making Needle Felted Animals:

I also got a few more bits of wool to make different bits. So some rainbow mice, some white mice, and I got some more needles too. That felting book was signed by the authors too.

So now thats 3 Books signed by authors. So not sure if that’s starting a trend.

I got a new Lucet and some instruction booklets. The instructions are so I can go a lot further than the basic stitches. I’ve been using one for a little bit so I can now go a bit further.

At the show was also a store from a place I have got most of my knitting needles from. Purlescence, so I got a few more needles from them to go with the ones I already have. It was great because I was able to introduce myself to them and they were pleased to meet me.

At the show there was also some wildlife. Some cuts sheep, goats and an alpaca:

On the way over the rain was hammering down and we went past some fields that were well and truly flooded.

The main thing I didn’t like at the show was the noise of the rain on the tin roof. It was almost deafening. It really got in my head and I’m surprised I didn’t end up with a headache.

The other shocking thing that happened today was……… I ended up getting cold. It was weird because my top half was fine but the bottom half was freezing. I ended up ha e to be an old man and get a blanket to go round my legs. Shocking.

That’s about it from the show today. Over the last week I finished a hat for Harvey and it was sent home the other day and he absolutely loved it:

I was so chuffed when I got that video, it made me feel really good.

Friday night we had a meal out with the family. It was my Aunty and Uncles 60th wedding anniversary. A meal out to celebrate. We went to a local restaurant, being honest I didn’t think it was that great. I though the selection of food to choose from was pretty limited. Lots of fish and not much else I could or wanted to eat so not my cup of tea.

MS wise there was a team meeting one Wednesday night. That seemed to go ok. Issue from it was I did the minutes. While doing this and typing them up I didn’t do a very good job. Went overboard with something’s and not enough detail in other. I also managed to really upset someone. When I found that out it made me feel really really bad.

I did change things round and apologised a hell of a lot to the people I upset. I still felt bad for making them feel bad. Tears were shed on all side from that. After all I think and hope things were fixed and we did end up hugging so I hope that make them feel better. I know I do after that. I just hope they do too.

So now to do some luceting and to finish of a bracelet I started making last night:

And after all that and if you’re still reading……..

Love and light.

So craft wise there has been knitting, macrame and needle felting.

With the knitting I’ve been working on a bright yellow teabag hat for Harvey. A Baby Hat with Yoda ears and a pretty blanket. I think they’re all looking pretty good. What do you think?

With macrame I haven’t really done much. Just trying to figure the knots out mainly. I have just been playing with some string and watching YouTube videos. You tube is amazing you can use it to learn all sorts of different things. If you want to learn something it’s more than likely there will be a YouTube video or channel that can help.

Now onto needle felting. The main thing I have to say about this craft is that the needles hurt like hell if you accidentally stab your fingers. The needles are sharp. With needle felting I’ve been making bees, lots of bees. They’re really easy to make and I think they look cool.

that’s one bee. It’s only small but there are quite a few like that. I’ve also done a bigger one:

this needle felting thing is quite fun. It’s keeping me out of mischief anyway. I’m also working on a needle felted Green Man. It’s looking cool so far.

when that’s done I think it’s gonna look really good.

With all of that, I just need to decide what I’m going to do next. Do I start something new or do I start finishing other projects?

I know the hats are relatively easy and don’t need much concentration so I could save them and do them at knit and natter. The blanket pattern changes slightly on each right side row. As that need some concentration I’ll probably be better doing that at home.

There is a knitting show on over in Skipton next weekend. I wouldn’t mind going on the Saturday but mum has another appointment. So we may be able to go on Sunday but that means we’d miss the Sunday afternoon knitting session in Rammy. I like that one, it’s just chilled, relaxed and overall a great time. My mum enjoys that session too. The other people that go are really nice and I get on with them really well. They’re always ready to lend a helping hand if it’s needed, they have so much knowledge it’s unbelievable.

That’s it’s for yarn crafts. I like that name it seems to sober everything. But thinking about it with macrame it’s rope and with felting it’s wool but it’s not in strings. Anyway on to the rest of the weekend.

Saturday was Development group and that went well. Think everyone in the group managed to get something out of it so it’s all good on that front.

Fatigue has been hitting hard and fast this week. It’s like I’m constantly trying to fight my body to get it to do something. There is the pain as always but confusion has been around to. The other week I wanted to call a sewing machine an Eskimo. I keep forget the words for things and want to call them something else.

Some people are suggesting I may be having a relapse but I should have any. That’s as long as the drugs worked and reset my immune system. There seems to be a stinking cold working it’s way round the family at the moment so it could be that. Not sure though. I hope if it is a cold it doesn’t get any worse. Poor immune system is very good if you get ill.

That’s enough stressing, Zia I get ill I get ill. No amount of worrying will change it.

Love and light everyone

Oh my god! I’m sat here booing my eyes out, untangling cord and watching Queer Eye more than a make over. I love this program. I’ve watched all the episodes on Netflix already but watching them again.

Some of the things that are being mentioned in the program are hitting home. The Fab 5 are absolutely amazing and do some amazing work. They keep talking about acceptance, from friends, from family and from the rest of the world.

There is still so much that needs to be done in the world so acceptance is world wide. I’m not just talking about LGBT+ acceptance but all forms are needed, people of other races, religions, colours, creeds or whatever are all equal and everyone needs to accept everyone else.

One of the reasons Queer Eye hits home so much is that I spent a long long long time hiding who I really was and not accepting myself. I told my friends first, and that was scary as hell. Even though people are open, friendly and loving you still fear the worst. I was so scared I thought I would loose my friends and have no one to talk to about anything. Yes I have since lost contact with most of them but there is still the odd message or loving moment.

Then something happened that was even scarier. Time to tell the family well mum and dad. I’d not long since started the new job. As it was only across the road from the Trafford Centre I ended up spending a lot of time there and a lot of money. I had been using makeup at dance events to make myself look more human especially after lots of drinking and some very late nights. Ali and Charlie did it for me then but I decided it was time to learn how to do it myself. So a few trips round selfridges I became quite a regular at the MAC counter. They taught me a hell of a lot (being honest I haven’t done much with the makeup recently though) so one night finishing a bit late a work, I took a trip across the road.

I was learning and having my face painted then it was time for the journey home. Like I said I waited because rather than a 3 hour journey I could waste time and have a 20 minute journey instead. Because I had my face painted I just went in and sat in the front room. At the time I just didn’t care what anyone thought. When I got home and sat in the living room my mum said you’ve got some makeup on, is that not a bit gay? I said does it matter if I was. Then she said does that mean you are. I said yes. That’s when the fear set in. Am I going to be kicked out or what’s going to happen.

They were great!!!!! Nothing bad at all.

So In the grand scheme of things it’s not really earth shattering but there is that story.

Anyway back to acceptance, I’m here, I’m me! I’m strong and still standing. If you don’t like me well you can just go and

FUCK RIGHT OFF!!!

The other thing with queer eye is I think I have a bit of a crush. Antoni, oh my god. Very good looking and has a really nice personality.

I’ve also found two new hobbies, needle felting and macrame. Both sound old and giddy Duffy but I enjoy them. Well I think I do. All I’ve made with needle felting so far is two little hearts. That was fun but also painful. Getting stabbed by one of the needles is not a very nice thing and it hurt like a bitch. I have holes in my thumb and one finger. So so far the things I have made I have put blood and sweat into them. Maybe not the sweat but the stabbing did draw blood.

Macrame, I haven’t actually done anything yet. I have the rope, I just need to decide what to do with it. There are plenty of YouTube videos so I’ll starts there. I’m torn between a wall hanging or a tree of life. I might do both. The cord I was untangling I’m going to use to make macrame bracelets. Again just need to find a pattern/design I like.

The other day I arm knitted a massive blanket for my sister. We got the wool at the creative craft show. It was a bit difficult arm knitting it. That’s because of the weight and size. It’s looked something like one of these:

She likes it, just have another one to do for here. I’ll get round to it eventually.

Other things are I’m scared senseless at the moment about the B word. There’s talk of issues with the NHS, drug shortages and other stuff. I know I’m addicted to some of my medication, not from drug abuse but from following doctors orders. I hope that medication isn’t affected, it will cause no end of problems, not just for me but for others too. Im going to say something now that may lose me some friends but as I said earlier you can fuck off. The whole things needs stopping and Nigel Fuckface or whatever he’s called just need taking out and publicly flogging. I feel he has caused most of this, shut up and do your job. You are one of the elected people put there to do a job you say doesn’t exist. You have a say in that parliament that you say just barks orders, you have a voice there to say how things should be done, if you did your job properly there wouldn’t be an issue. Get on and do it, if you don’t want to do fuck off and let someone else do it. You seem to be against the theme of acceptance. The only person you seem to like is yourself and your bank balance.

I know I’ve said everyone needs accepting and I don’t t want to be a pig from animal farm and say everyone is equal but some are more equal than others but that seems to be what you and many others want to say and do. Apologies for the hurt, pain, fear and anxiety you have caused and get on with your job. If you did that perhaps more people would accept you! I feel really bad for saying these things and contradicting myself but I feel these things needed to be said. All I can do is ask for your forgiveness and acceptance then we can all move on. I accept that you have these views, I wholeheartedly disagree with them but they are yours and not mine and that is where is will be left.

Above all accept everyone for who they truly are, don’t try to change them into something they aren’t. Remember the true thing that connects everyone and everything is love, preach that loud and proud.

Love and light

Why is it considered rude to shout extremely loudly in someone’s face? All I want to do is tell them that they look like a shit drag queen (insult to drag queens, they have better makeup skills) and that they need to shut the FUCK UP!!!!!

Everyone does not need to hear every conversation you have on the phone or every fecking video you watch on it.

I’ve never wanted to do sciencey stuff before. But now, I have an overwhelming urge to build a faraday cage and lock you in it. And then, on the outside play a continuous loop of makeup videos from YouTube. You never know, you might learn something. But I doubt it.

Anyway……. we are back in Plymouth. We got back yesterday after an epic sail from Guernsey. I got an extremely rude awakening, but I’ll tell you about that in a bit.

So after Guernsey we went over to Jersey. DD was driving the boat as always but it became like a mad free for all when you could get in. On the waiting pontoons boats were like 5 or 6 deep and people all cast off at the same time to try and get a spot in the marina. One or two of the boats were going to stay outside as they were going off early in the morning. The rest though fought it out big time. It was like one of thing we YouTube videos on black Friday where people are hammering on the doors of the stores. In fact I think it was worse to be honest. We were there for the night and we then headed off to France the next day.

At cast or san cast one of the three. We went there next. We arrived mid afternoonish. I went to turn the radio off, I was getting a double whammy, charging my phone and listening to music at the same time. I fell over. I’m not sure if it was bumps caused by another boat going past or if I just fell. Well I fell, and landed on the floor. I have well and truly fucked my back up. It hurts like hell. I think I must have landed on it or something.

So there I was, in agony, tears streaming from my eyes sat on the floor near the chart table. I’ve just realised I’m making the boat sound all massive and posh. It isn’t the old girl is really like a caravan that floats. I still love her to bits though. I’m able to get round without using my stick, handholds everywhere it’s great. That feeling of freedom is soo good. I’m still using my wheelchair if I need to get round anywhere though in towns and stuff like that.

Anyway back to my plunge of death. Well over dramatic but still it hurt. While I was there straight away I couldn’t breath. Oh my god, and all the rest of the obscenities that flowed. I was thinking my back is broken I’m going to be permanently paralysed. Well yes I can move and still get about so not really that bad. The second day in France we went into the town. It was a nice seaside town in France. Very picturesque, it had a massive rock in the middle of the marina, that was interesting to look at.

On the way to the town was a path that ran along the shore. People had done some rock balancing. Didn’t get any pictures but they still looked cool. We went for a meal that evening. I had steak tar tar, first time I’ve had it, wasn’t really anything special but it wasn’t bad either. So no I can say I’ve had fillet steak bluer than the way I normally have it. My back was still killing and I think that it may have caused issues with my waterworks. Have the urge but nothing happens. That is really annoying.

Next day back to jersey, we were heading for Guernsey but decided rather than try a 48 hour trip or something really excessive the Jersey it would be. We were there for a night. We had a little trip round the town of St Helier. It’s like Manchester. Nothing at all special. Next day back to Guernsey.

That was a quick trip. No tides or anything to worry about. It was that that caused the problem the day before. We got there but stayed outside and didn’t go into the marina this time. Mum went for a shower and me and dad went for lunch in Dix Neurf. It’s a really nice, cafe, bar, bistro, brassiere place. Nice food and atmosphere. I did a bit of shopping while we were in Guernsey too. Got a new power bank. Also got some bits from Boots, some vodka and some fudge. Meal out again that night, mainly because some whingey arsed twat waffle wanted a lobster dinner. I didn’t think it was that great though.

Yesterday was the epic journey back to Plymouth and my rude awakening. Mum and dad got up and set off about 5am ish. About 5:30am waves were crashing over the boat. The night before I had my normal evening smoke (pipe) out of the roof rather than have to climb over mum and dad. When I went back in I thought I shut the hatch again. I didn’t do it properly. As waves were crashing round us one came over the roof and decided to find the not shut properly hatch and give me a cold, salty, seawater shower. Let’s just say I moved quite quickly when that happened and the were a few more swear words too.

So I got changed and moved into mum and dads bed. They weren’t using it. So snuggled down and got a few more hours kip. Then it was still a long day. I was in and out a bit, doing some knitting, some sleeping, some driving, some sail bits, watch a film on my phone, some sitting a bit more sleeping, some more of the film and some eating.

Long ass day crossing the channel. The boat left 5am ish and we got back to Plymouth about 9:30pm. It was bouncing all the way. Water work issues while bouncing across the channel don’t mix too well. We made it with no major issues.

Sailing about for two weeks without seeing much all the way back across the channel and then two dolphins came to play as we were coming back into the Plymouth Sound. They swam round the boat for about 5 to 10 minutes and then went off again. Was really lovely to see them though.

Today back in Plymouth, showers shave and trying to clean the boat. So having to live stuff round with a sore back isn’t the easiest. I all so had a bit of a blow at lady muck lying in state barking orders. It wound me up, she was going on about having no energy. She spent nearly all day in bed while we were coming back to Plymouth. And today she went over to the city how much energy does that use. So much. Too much in fact to do anything.

So after that I decided to sit in my wheelchair on the pontoon, smoke and write this. At the moment I’m finishing this off sat in a restaurant. The traditional end of cruise meal. Something that has happened at the end of every holiday on the boat.

As I was sat in my chair outside the boat I heard it was time to set off. So I did set off. Bit along the pontoon was a little ramp thing. What happens to this spaz. I go arse over tit in my wheelchair. Flipped completely backwards. Lay there on the pontoon was nice to see that people ran to help though. All wanted to check I was ok. I was so embarrassed, feeling like a helpless spaz. I managed to get up and stand my chair back up. Dad came along and pushed me up to the restaurant.

I think I have fucked my back up more, I’m embarrassed, feel like I could cry but trying to hold it together. Anyway nice meal coming up so look on the brighter side of things.

Hope my back eases up and I’m not looking forward to the trip home. M5, M6 they are crap at the best of times hope they’re ok tomorrow. Ganesh will be asked to help out.

Back to lady muck, how many photos do you need to take of the table, your glass and everyone else. The food hasn’t arrived yet, more pictures to come.

Here are some pictures from the trip:

Had to fly the witch too. It is for a sailing club but was flying it for all the freaks, the spiritualists and the people who do their own thing and don’t quite fit in.

Anyway, love and light all.

PS going out for a smoke from the restaurant I do it again, another back flip off the chair. Sore back, sore shoulder and sore knee. I’ll just have to give up.